A Farm Girl's Heart

   Welcome! This is my new page, "A Farm Girl's Heart".  Here I will be writing of the many adventures that God is taking me on as I embark on this journey. I guess a good place to start would be at the beginning. For those of you who have known me for years or even for a tiny while, alot of this may be repeat...or maybe, just maybe you will learn something new. :)
   For the past few years our family has been operating and running our small business, Udder Joy Farms. Alot of activities fell under this including milking and harvesting milk for our family, creating a Retail Bath and Body line and opening up our small farm for tours and visits. This coupled with my full-time job was alot on my plate. I have to confess that many mornings I milked (@5:30am) in tears because I felt so pushed to my max. I loved our business and our farm, but I was overloaded...bottom line. Praise God that finally in June 2012, I was able to reduce to part time employment which helped relieve some of the stress and pressure.
    For the most part, I handled most things, but honestly I was not happy. My heart so desired to just slow down. I felt like I was running from fire to fire to fire...constantly. I struggled with constant feelings of inadequacy because it seemed like I was doing nothing 100% and everything 25%. Everything felt out of control to me all the time...and the more I tried to get them back in line...the more "crooked" they got. I use to dream about what it would be like to just, "have the time to"......  I loved all my "stay at home" friends, but envied them at the same time...which broke my heart to feel such a way towards the friends who make my heart sing! I honestly got to a point where I dreaded waking up in the morning.
   In June, Gary and I sought Biblical counseling, not because we were struggling, but because we just felt overwhelmed in everything. It was here that The Lord brought to the forefront that things were out of alignment within our home, relationship and life...so we began realigning. We began praying and seeking and seeing the areas of needed repair and adjustment. It was a trying time, but an exciting time as well....so began the journey towards the move.....
   So where does this leave everything now. Well....my life has gone from being completely overwhelming to excessively quiet. Honestly, I struggled with "not working and being constantly busy" for the entire first month we were here. I felt like I was goin nuts! And don't get me wrong, I am not bashing working...I actually loved my job at SOSCA and my job as a bus driver even more than that....I'm just sayin, God was calling me to a time of no work and rest and I wasn't listening.  I wanted it so badly, but no way could we do that...way to risky, way to scary...such lack of faith in God I had. I knew he was calling for it. Gary knew he was calling for it...we both were just to afraid to step outta the boat...so God tipped the boat over! :)
   Anyways...here I am now...a stay at home Wife and Mother. This blogging page will be about my adventures as I am on this journey. This is all new ground for me...I have worked most of my adult life and I am thankful for all the wonderful people that are in my life because of those jobs....some of the people whom I treasure the most are results of my time working! So for now, I invite all of you to journey along with me as God unfolds each of my days. :) He is truly the author of this new untold story that I prayed so long to be a part of! I am simply along for the ride! :)

Suzanne  :)